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written by Margaret Royal

Love, Lies and Voldemort

The Lianca Recaps

Thursday, September 18, 2003

Episode summary: Bianca informs Maggie and David that she wants to have an abortion; Lena overhears Maggie and Bianca talking at the boathouse, learns Bianca is pregnant, and becomes suicidal; Maggie wonders whether Bianca might be unduly influenced in her decision by her mother.

At the penthouse, Bianca tells David and Maggie that after reading the pamphlets over and over and exploring all her options, there's only one choice she can make. David asks what that is. "My mother was right," Bianca declares, "and the statistics back her up. Most women in my situation do what I'm gonna do, and it really is the only way out; if I don't do it, then it will be like Michael Cambias is with me for the rest of my life, and what we were talking about, the same, Maggie, that that is gonna bring to my family and to my child? No. No. This is it; this is, this is the only option; it's, it's the best choice for everyone involved." She turns around and stares at the empty fireplace. David comes up behind her and tells her he thinks it's important that she try not to think about everyone else right now, since she's the one who will have to live with the choice. Bianca says she knows: "I am so sick of going over and over the same questions again and again, having everyone look at me like I am a bomb about to explode. No, I need to, I need to end this." She goes to the coffee table and picks up the Daddy Cambias letter and re-exposits about how he gave her the check so that she could heal herself, and she says, looking firmly at David, that's what she's going to do: "I'm gonna terminate my pregnancy." When I watched this on tape for the first time, I yelled, "Yes!" at that moment, despite the nagging, sickening feeling that it wouldn't actually come about. Frons Ass was too pleased with himself at the One Life to Live luncheon luncheon to let Voldespawn go away like this, and McTavish is too vindictive and hack-minded a writer to change directions on a storyline headed straight to hell. But good for Binky, anyway, for saying what she wants now, even if she'll go back to her pod later. Commercials.

The commercial immediately following this bombshell is the Prevacid spot with the woman who looks sort of like a 40-year-old Bianca. Saddled with a 20-year-old Voldespawn who gives her heartburn, or free to have heartburn without a 20-year-old Voldespawn? I guess I'll have to keep watching to find out, the fuckers.

Bianca tells Maggie and David, with no doubt or hesitation in her voice, that she knows she's making the right decision. David tells her she can always change her mind, but she says that it feels as thought "a weight has been lifted," and she'd like to get the procedure done as soon as possible—tomorrow, at the clinic. She also wants David to do it: "because you've been with me since this whole thing started, and I want you to be there when I end it." She reaches to touch his hand and tells him she feels safe with him. Look, y'all. Bianca doesn't hate men. Did you get that? You want me to rewind and play it again? It's good they made it clear, because I had my worries up until this point. Bianca and David arrange a noon appointment, and he tells her not to eat or drink after midnight (which is "around now"), and she says she'll be there. Maggie offers to drive her, and David heads for the door. He tells her that it's a rough decision, but she's made it, so she can leave the rest to him.

Once David leaves, Bianca turns back to Maggie and offers her the ice cream on the tray, but Mags turns it down with a forced smile. Binks looks at her. "You don't approve," she guesses. Maggie replies that it's "not [her] call" and just wants Binks to be okay. "I just want it to be over," Bianca says, "can you understand that?" Maggie can and suggests they get out of there, "go take a drive and look at the stars until the sun comes up." Ready? O-kay! Gimme a B! (B!) Gimme an F! (F!) Gimme an F! (F!) What's that spell? (BFF!) Bianca thinks "it'll be morning before [they] know it," and they go.

Bianca and Maggie enter the boathouse. Like, what happened to their romantic BFF drive? They exclaim about the crisp air and clear skies, "and it will all be the same this time next year—the whole circle of life," Maggie says. Yeah. Not if there's a nuclear winter, M. Ever think about that? North Korea scares me, does it scare you? Huh??? I remember around this time last year considering what would happen if George Bush got his way on Iraq. I was pretty convinced the end of the world would start with Israel and Palestine using the Bush Doctrine as justification for attacking each other, then India and Pakistan, and then North Korea would send some bombs our way pre-emptively, and the U.S. would respond with full nuclear arsenal, and it would be like War Games except we would all be incinerated, the world would no longer exist, and there would be no one around to remember anything or bear witness to what these people did. Look at that, it didn't happen . . . yet. But I remember obsessing about it sleeplessly. Here is my point: Maggie just doesn't seem like the type of person to consider that the world might stop. I say that not because I am special but because Maggie is a dunderhead. I don't care if she thinks her patronizing "circle of life" spiel makes her a good friend. She needs to get neurotic and depressed sometimes and then maybe she'll be a little more interesting.

Yes, anyway, Bianca smiles and remarks on the breeze; Maggie declares it a "total Indian summer" and dorks that it's "not too cold to go sooo-wimming! I dare you!" Bianca thinks the water's probably too cold, so Maggie declares her a wuss. Bianca protests, gaahhhh, this goes on for too long. Bianca doesn't have a swimsuit! How can Maggie pressure her like that! "Oh my God, you're so crazy! Rilly! Sup bff, g2g cuz pos l8r ROFLMAO avril rulz!!!!!!!!1" I'm glad BAM is not a couple for numerous narrative reasons, but also, if they ever had cute sex banter, it would be the worst kind, and I would want to kill both of them, and that would make them akin to the Greys. *shudder* In Eden and Liz's defense, they sound embarrassed for themselves.

Bianca finally agrees to swim, so they take off their overshirts and swing hands on the edge of the . . . dock? Is that what you call that 8-foot-long wooden walkway in a boathouse? Suddenly, Lena's sexy visage appears behind them, out from the foliage. She watches silently and smiles. BAM count to three and "jump in," hee, as the AMC directors would have us believe, and as they shriek and squeal, Lena's smile gets bigger.

As Lena creeps around the side, Bianca whines good-naturedly that she shouldn't have let Maggie talk her into swimming, because the water was freezing. Soaking wet, they sit down and put their overshirts back on, and Maggie asks if Binks is okay. Binks replies that she's "scared." Lena listens, her hands curled up on her shoulder, not quite touching her chin. Look at that, Lena is already about a thousand times more interesting a listener than Ryan. Makes me wanna watch old FEM clips.

"I know," Maggie says. She tells Binks about a girl in her dorm who dealt with the same stuff last year and talked to a counselor, who told her that it was normal and okay to be scared and sad. "The counselor was right," Binks muses. "I don't think I'm gonna sleep tonight. But at least by tomorrow, I won't be pregnant anymore." Lena has been listening placidly, but at this, she uncurls her hands, turns her head back toward Bianca and Maggie, and looks away again in schock. Commercials.

Bianca is still thinking aloud to Maggie, and Lena, still listening, crouches on the ground outside the boathouse. "You know, whenever I think about that night," Bianca says, "which is all the time, I think about what I could have done differently so that things wouldn't turn out the way they did, and then I wouldn't be pregnant, and I wouldn't need to keep this appointment at the clinic tomorrow; I keep asking myself, 'what if?'" Maggie replies that "what ifs can really tear you apart." Binks knows, but she can't help it. "What if the power hadn't gone out that night? What if I hadn't gone home alone," she smiles ruefully. "What if I hadn't gone to Myrtle's at all; what if—you know, Lena and I were in the park that day planning for our future. What if she hadn't left with Adam?" Lena blinks slowly and drops her head. "What if we had just taken off right then and there and gone to Brussels or to Rome?" "And what if Lena never came into your life?" Maggie bitches. "And what if Lena and Michael ran their scam in some other town or some other state? Then it wouldn't have mattered if you came home by yourself, or it wouldn't have mattered if the lights went out. You would've been safe." Lena listens, her hands over her mouth and her eyes darting rapidly. Bianca says that Maggie "can't blame Lena for any of this. She is as much Michael's victim as anyone else, and she has suffered for it." Maggie thinks Lena deserves to suffer, because she "led Michael into [Bianca's] life." Lean rises, obviously affected, and pads off. Binks stands silently for a moment, then speaks: "None of this is Lena's fault. You know what, Michael did what he did all by himself." Obviously flustered, Maggie suggests they get Binks home, because tomorrow is a "big day." Binks, her hair curling with the water, grimly notes the irony, and they gather their shoes and go.

A room at the Pine Cone. As neon blinks outside, Lena steps into the room, pressing her back against the door in shock. "Bianca," she sighs. She turns on the lights and sits tearfully at the desk in the foreground, on which sits . . . a vase of really nice flowers. Huh? She picks up a pen and a sheet of stationery and begins to write: "My Sweet Bianca, I'm so sorry for not understanding. All the times I forced my way into your life, begged you to give us another chance, I know now how painful that was for you. Every time I made you look at me, all you could see was Michael. And now the unbearable has happened: you're pregnant. You did nothing to deserve such torment. I'm the one who should suffer because I'm the one who brought Michael into your life. Please know that my only wish was to love you. If only I knew some way to make it right, but it's too late." Crying, Lena rips the paper in half, crumples it, and breathes, "it's too late."

Back at the penthouse, Bianca reads aloud a note Erica has left her and thinks aloud that her mother will be "so relieved" when she tells her her decision. "You know, you keep on bringing up what your mom wants," Maggie says. Binks looks at her: "Do you have a problem with that?" No, Maggie says, but she asks Binks if she's ending the pregnancy because she wants to or because she's trying to make Erica happy. Binks looks back.

Bianca is offended that Maggie would "question [her] motives" when she knows how she's agonized over the decision, and Mags says again that Erica's name keeps coming up when Bianca talks about it. "You know what, we're not having this conversation right now," Binks says incredulously. "I've already made up my mind—my mind, Maggie—and I don't want to think about it anymore; I want to think about . . . what classes we're taking at PVU and how many courses I can fit into my schedule, okay—" Maggie apologizes. Bianca does, too: "please don't listen to me; I am so stressed out." Maggie agrees, which is why she's going to be her "wheels tomorrow and hand if you need to hold onto [sic]." Of course she'll need one, Binks says. Then: "You know what, Maggie, it is a good thing that you and I never hooked up, because . . . God, what a mess that would have been." Hee. Word, Binky. "Oh, don't worry about it, you're not my type either," Maggie snarks. Binks gets a big "doh!" smile on her face. "Oh, you know what I mean; I mean—our friendship. It would've totally screwed everything up, and I don't think I would've survived any of this without you." She takes Maggie's hand and clasps it hard, and we get a tight shot of the fist of BAM BFF. "Thank you," she says. They smile at each other, embrace, and say that they love each other.

Meanwhile, at the Pine Cone, NoLove!NoFs!Lena rises from the desk, goes over to the nightstand, picks up a tiny framed picture of Bianca, and sits on the bed. She caresses the photo. "If only you know how much I—" she kisses it—"it's all for you." She puts it back and goes back over to the desk, treating us to a torso and legs shot of her criminally smokin' black outfit, opens a drawer, and pulls out our old friend, the box of insect poison. She raises her tear-stained face and looks—not determined, more as though she's just getting the idea. Lena, honey, if you didn't see that coming from light years away...

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Screen grabs courtesy of Olga Online. © 2000-2003 (texts) are with the author. If not otherwise stated, the author is Ivanova. All rights reserved.