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written by Margaret Royal

Love, Lies and Voldemort

The Lianca Recaps

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

Episode summary: Kendall and Erica have an explosive confrontation in front of Bianca.

At Erica's penthouse, Kendall continues to lurk outside the bedroom door and eavesdrops on the Erica-Bianca convo. Erica is trying to tell a hesitant Binks that abortion (a word they haven't actually used, by the way) is really the best thing for her to do, and to think about what the reality of raising the kid would be like. There's some movement, Erica asks where Bianca is going, and Kendall flees out of the anteroom toward the living room. Binks emerges declaring that she "hate[s] this" and "not knowing what to do." She heads for the living room, too, and when she gets there, there's no sign of Kendall. She sits on the couch. Erica perches next to her and explains that had abortion been legal when she was raped, had she "had that choice, [she] would've taken it." Kendall listens, apparently hidden by a half-wall near the kitchen, but it looks obvious to me that they would have seen her when they came in. Whatever. Bianca asks whether Erica's ever thought about what it would be like "if Kendall had never existed." "I think about all of the pain that could have been avoided," Erica replies, "not just for me, but for all of us, including Kendall. I mean, Kendall lives every single day with so much pain. She has so much self-doubt; she's so afraid that she's really like her father." Binks thinks Kendall's "worked a lot of that out," though, even with Erica, and that the two of them have gotten close and shared a great deal. Erica agrees, but she "[does]n't know what to think" now that Kendall has "turned around and married Michael Cambias." Bianca remarks that everyone does things they regret later on—awww, understanding Binky—but Erica thinks Kendall's given no sign of regret in word or demeanor. Binks is concerned (again with this bullshit!) that this pregnancy may be her only chance to have a child, "to be a mother." Erica duhs for the rest of us, and for the second time, that of course it's not her only chance, and is this really what she wants, to have the child of "the monster who raped [her]?" "Of course not," Kendall says hotly, emerging from her niche and clicking smartly out into the living room. "She is her mother's daughter after all." Commercials.

Erica asks Kendall who let her in. Kendall holds up her keychain and snits, "you did." She reminds Erica that she had done a bunch of errands for her the day before the wedding with Jack; Erica goes all irrelevant on her ass and asserts that Kendall had insisted that she be allowed to help. Kendall agrees that she had wanted to be included in any way she could, and she did something else, too—"what was it?" "Don't," Erica urges in a low voice. Kendall: "Oh. Right. I kept your secret. You know: the one about Greenlee being Jackson's daughter?" Hee, the next shot is framed such that Erica's bustline and Bianca's face, in profile, form the same shape, until they pull an ABBA and have Binks turn her head to regard Erica in confusion. Kendall twists the knife: Erica "wouldn't dare tarnish [Bianca's] image" of her by turning to her, but "[she] could turn to [Kendall]." Point taken, Kendall, but in Erica's defense, wasn't Bianca already off with Maggie when those conversations took place, even during the Mary Smythe vs. Cake beatdown? Kendall continues: "You could show me your true feelings, and why not, I mean, you don't care what I think; I don't matter to you." Erica tells her that it's not true, even going further and reminding her that she gave her the choice to tell Jackson what she knew, if she wanted to. Continuity quibble #2: wasn't the issue over whether Kendall would tell Greenlee, seeing as how she's friends and business partners with her? Again, whatever. "But I didn't [tell], did I?" Kendall replies. "I chose you. I was there for you; I stood up for you. I kept your secret and you said you'd never forget it. You actually gave me a hug and you told me that, that—you thanked me for it. You even gave me Mona's pearls, do you remember that, Mother?" Erica does. But that was before Kendall "betrayed [them]," she says, by marrying Michael Cambias. She's willing to discuss all of it with her if she wants, but "not now"—she gestures to Bianca—"this is not the time." "Oh, it's never the time when it's about me," Kendall smiles ruefully. Erica replies that it really isn't the time; Kendall "barged in here" on a "very personal and private" convo between her and Bianca, so no, it's not about her. Hee, Binks sulks in the background with a "here we go again" expression. Kendall tells Erica she heard them talking about her and not to deny it. Bianca looks pissed. "You want Bianca to get rid of your baby the same way you wish you'd gotten rid of me," Kendall declares. Erica looks exasperated, but she also looks as though she wants to explain.

Kendall slams her purse down on the penthouse loveseat as Erica apologizes but says she overheard something she shouldn't have and that this is not about her; it's about Bianca. "And you, don't forget that part," Kendall retorts. "You want to make sure Bianca doesn't make the same mistake you did and actually have the poor kid." She tells Erica that she knows that what happened to her was "a terrible thing, but I'm not sorry that you had me, and I'm not sorry that I'm here." Erica isn't sorry herself and protests that it's not true, either, that she spends time wishing Kendall hadn't ever been born. Kendall spins and tells Binks she should get rid of the kid right now, because "God forbid the child should actually grow up and actually wants or needs you to be its mother." Subjunctive, Kendall, please. Bianca is thoroughly pissed, tells Kendall she "can't deal with this right now," and leaves the room. Well, that was abrupt and undramatical. Erica evenly lays into her other daughter: "Is this how you want to be a part of our family, you want to come in here and bully you way into it?" She continues to berate her, but Kendall declares that she'll never be a part of the family, because Erica won't let her. "Oh, you bear no responsibility in this whatsoever," Erica mocks. "You just spit in your sister's face. You married the man who raped her." Oh, Kendall. You know what she says next? "Well, women always go after a man who reminds them of their father; you know that." Erica takes a beat to digest the idea of all these women with the same father going after the same man, then tells Kendall she's disgusting. Kendall wonders what she's supposed to say: "I am my father's daughter, as far as you're concerned." Erica tells her that she really would like to believe in her, but with the marriage to Michael Cambias and the attitude she's had about it since, she's shown her "why [she] can't." "Well, maybe if you took the time to actually hear me out," Kendall yells, tears rising in her voice. "Instead of assuming the worst of me and slapping me across the face before I could tell you what really happened with Michael Cambias!" Alicia totally brings it in this scene, damn. She sounds exactly like a kid trying to get through to her parent, and the sad irony is that Erica doesn't feel the same familiarity with Kendall. Okay, then, Erica tells her, and demands that she explain why she married Michael. A tear rolls down Kendall's cheek as we go to commercial.

Kendall tells Erica there's no point in explaining now, because she's just going to believe what she wants anyway. Erica knows she wants her to think something, so she asks again, what does Kendall want her to think? "That maybe I did all of this for you?" Kendall offers, her voice trembling. "Me?" Erica says. Kendall: "Yeah. So that you'd finally love me." Poor Kendall. "But you know what? Now I know that everything you've ever said about wanting me to be a part of your life and a part of your family was a lie! From the moment you found out, the moment you found out you were pregnant, you wanted me to disappear, and now you want to force Bianca to do the exact same thing!" Erica swears that it's not true and rather abruptly tells Kendall she needs her to leave. Kendall's cell phone rings, and for some reason, she picks it up. Who does that? You're having a fight with your mother about your own value as a human being and you answer your cell phone? "I said leave," Erica shrills again. Bianca has come back in and goes to comfort her. Kendall answers the phone: "Michael, hi!" "No, that's impossible," Erica says, grabbing the phone and shutting it off. Kendall is pissed, because she wanted to talk to Michael. "You talk to him somewhere else," Erica says, one finger in the air. "Whatever you're trying to do, I want you to stop." Kendall cranes over Erica's shoulder and tells Binks, who has her back turned, that she needs to get rid of the baby immediately, otherwise "this is what you have to look forward to for the rest of your life. And then you'll see, Bianca, how the pain of an unwanted child never ends."

Erica doesn't know what to say to Kendall if she can't see that she's trying to help Bianca. "You never know what to say to me, Erica, so I'll say it for you," Kendall replies. "You hate that abortion [Ohmigod, they said the word!] was not a legal option for you all those years ago. You hate that you had to have your little child of rape, and in short, you hate me. Well let me tell you something. If you think you're sorry for having me now, you ain't seen nothin' yet." She grabs her stuff and leaves Erica and Bianca standing stunned. Commercials.

Bianca starts to ask something about "[her] baby," but Erica bulldozes over it and says that that's the thing: the kid is also Michael's, just as Kendall is Richard Fields's. That's why Kendall hates herself, because she knows who her father was and what he did to Erica. "Kendall was born with a burden that no child should ever be asked to bear," she says. "You have that option, now, and you should consider it." Bianca knows, but is exhausted and wants to lie down. Erica agrees, gives her a hug, and breathes that she loves her. Bianca flatly responds in kind. As she heads toward the bedroom, Erica asks her just to think "about how [she] can prevent this from becoming [her] life." Binks looks like she's thinking indeed.

At home, Bianca emerges from the kitchen with a cup and saucer and hears a knock on the door. She answers it—it's a delivery man, who has an envelope for her and asks her to sign for it. She does; he goes. It's manila, with no address label or anything, which is dumb. She opens it up. Inside, there's a letter-sized envelope addressed to her, from Cambias Industries. Really, you'd think they could do better than an ink jet printer. Confused, she opens it as the camera pans in on her, so we can't see what's inside. Whatever it is, she gasps in horror.

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