DykesVision / TV shows / All My Children / Lena & Bianca

written by Margaret Royal

Love, Lies and Voldemort

The Lianca Recaps

Monday, July 31

Erica's penthouse. Her hair is straight, all of a sudden (whither the Kendall perm?), and she's hanging out and sniffing some flowers. Kendall appears in her bridesmaid's dress. It's an olive-y brown, gauzy fabric with a tightly fitted bodice, lacy but not ruffly at the boobs, collar, and cuffs, with a pink sash near the waist. Eh? Kendall's hair has been pulled back except for a strand or two, which just looks messy. Erica tells her she looks "exquisite," and she thinks the dress and the pearls Kendall has on are "all the more beautiful because [her] daughter is wearing them." According to Kendall, Bianca is "still doing damage control." Erica wants Bianca to enjoy today. Kendall reassures her there's nothing to worry about. And here come Opal and Myrtle, bursting in with brio and clamor! Opal is in bee-right orange. Kraft Dinner cheese packet orange. Cheetos orange. Now Bianca appears in her dress, which is the same color as Kendall's, but all brocade-y. It goes up to her chest and then has, like, short sleeves that are attached somewhere, but there's no shoulder or anything. It is a very confusing dress. Binks has a skinny little sash the same shade of pink as Kendall's. Opal and Erica crow over Binks and then split to do Erica's hair. Bianca runs to Myrtle and apologizes for moving out so abruptly. Myrt is cool with it, of course, because she's just a big-hearted old carny. Myrtle says that Erica is happy in her daughters' blessings, but she notices Kendall looking a little uncomfortable. As Kendall replies that everything is going to be perfect, she's interrupted by a piercing Erica scream.

Erica has had a hair disaster, apparently. Kendall tries to distract her by getting her to tell Bianca about the honeymoon plans involving the whole fam-damily. Erica explains and says "[she] thought [they] could all have a nice, fresh start." Hello, like it was Erica's idea? I seem to remember it being a surprise to her when Jackson introduced it earlier "today." Whatever. Erica's words have evidently struck a chord with Bianca; she's fantasizing already—but does her face betray a tinge of wistfulness? They're getting ready to go when Bianca remembers a picture of Mona she brought for Erica to carry in her bouquet. Erica thinks it's a great idea. The phone rings, and Kendall answers: the first limo has arrived. Bianca and Myrtle go together to the car. Opal goes off somewhere. Seizing the opportunity, Kendall confesses that she can't stop worrying about the Montgomery-Smythe Paternity Crisis '03. Gee, Kendall, way to calm your mom's wedding butterflies. And she was doing so well so far! Erica says that Mary has been "silenced," temporarily. "There is no way that Mary Smythe is going to ruin Jack's and my happiest day," she dramatic ironies all over the place.

Jack thanks Anna for coming. She tells him he looks happy. He says he is, he found love, why wouldn't he be happy? David enters behind him; Anna notices. She tells Jackson to hold onto it (love, presumably) with everything he has. He says he will. Maggie enters behind David, sees him, thinks about fleeing, and reconsiders. Oh, for the record? Maggie is wearing a plum-colored dress with the weirdest freaking three-strap combination I've ever seen. It's impossible to explain; let's just say it's bizarre, a Möbius Strip of a dress, if you will, and leave it at that. Maggie greets David perfunctorily and tries to run off, but he catches her and asks about Bianca. She wants to brush it off, but he persists, and with some frustration, she tells him she can't say. She walks off out of the dining room, and David waits a second, then follows. And oddly, we don't see either of them in the next scene, in which . . .

Bianca enters the lobby. She spots a hotel employee and announces that she's with the "Kane-Montgomery wedding party"; she's looking for the photographer. Rando Employee directs her to the dining room, and she's about to book it in there when a familiar voice stops her. Oh, that two-syllable pronunciation of her name can only mean one person. And, yes, the Hot Polish Fox looks hot. She's in this vaguely 80's, almost shoulderless black v-neck sweatshirt and black pants, but that doesn't matter. She's the HPF. And she's wearing her ring from "yesterday"! She hesitates when Bianca turns around. Binks asks what she's doing there. Lena: "I wanted to see you; you look . . ." but she can't find the words, so stricken is she by Binks's loveliness. Or maybe she is just confused by the dress. Sigh. Poor clueless Fox.

On the other hand, hello, Bianca smacked down you and your commitment rings yesterday, and today is her mom's wedding. Not a good time, hon. Bianca is worried about Erica coming in and seeing Lena there; she wants everything to go smoothly for Erica. Lena steps forward and asks Bianca what "[she] want[s] for [her]self." Lena, don't you listen to me? Back off! Bianca, for once, steps back from Lena in total annoyance; she's not even remotely close to letting the HPF in. She won't look at her. "Not now, Lena, okay?" she says. "Okay," Lena replies. "Okay, I'll go, but I won't give up on you. I can't." When she's gone, Binks turns and looks after her. I don't know if that's a "poor Lena" look, an "I feel bad about this," look, or an "oh, shit, now she's going to keep hounding me" look, but it's a look. Anyway, that scene was pretty frickin' perntless, except as a piece of character assassination on Lena. So now she's supposed to be an almost-stalker? Great. Oh, and while we're on the subject of Lena's mishandled character, (a) what's up with her job situation? Supposedly she was working at SOS in addition to Greenlee Investments. We've seen SOS about a kajillion times since she got sprung from prison (i.e. the day before Voldemort), and yet we haven't seen her working there once. Would a little continuity hurt? How silly of me to ask. Of course it would. Having Lena work at SOS was just a contrivance for three scenes of Lianca reconciliation before she got stuck in jail for "insider trading," as if the PVPD had any jurisdiction to prosecute such stuff anyway. (2) Where the hell is she living? If she were still living at the Valley Inn, it might explain her presence in the lobby: Erica happens to be getting married in the same building where she lays her head. But we know she's not, because Mary's living in her room. Even though the furniture is different, the numbers on the door (867) are not, and sometimes you have to take the text at face value. So Lena's not living at the Valley Inn anymore, and apart from the stupidity of not giving her a new place to live, the writers have also made her out to be a stalker by not having any reason to be in the VI lobby except to accost Bianca on Erica's wedding day. Nice.

Maggie strides into the Valley Inn bar and asks for a glass of water. David comes up behind her and tries to convince her to tell him what's happened to Bianca. Maggie says that Binks needs help but also needs to be able to trust her, so she's waiting until after the wedding to "make sure that she . . . to get her through this." David wants to know what "this" would be. "Is it that bad?" Maggie, resigned but unwilling to say anything, nods. David's face clouds. Suddenly Binks shows up behind Maggie. She sees David's expression, and she freaks. "You told him?!" she asks Maggie. "You promised me that you weren't gonna tell!" Commercials.

Downstairs at the bar, David tells Bianca that Maggie didn't say anything, "but if there's a problem—" Bianca cuts him off saying there's no problem, and she's sick of explaining it to him. David asks about her promise to see a doctor. The wedding has been making her busy, she says, and "things" crazy. David suggests she stop by the clinic after the wedding, but Bianca says she's "fine. I mean it." Maggie stops David and tells him that "everything is fine." David consents to lay off, and he goes to find Anna. Maggie tells Binks she's "lucky he laid off like that," and asks how she is. Bianca feels "like a complete idiot" for almost losing her cool, which would blow her cover. Maggie wonders if Binks will just do nothing. Bianca says no, she's going on Erica and Jackson's honeymoon. Maggie is skeptical. But Binks isn't: "by the time I come home I will have forgotten all about—" Her face freezes for a split second and she stops herself from saying something— "everything." Poor B. I guess she's talking about Lena, too, in addition to the rape. Maggie doesn't think that running away will help. Bianca spies Erica coming in and flees, leaving Maggie alone and pissed off, in the bar.

Erica, whose hair is big and country singerish now, is hugging Myrtle. She's also wearing this powder blue Victorian-looking fitted topcoat with a high collar and buttons all the way up it. She really looks like she should be running a saloon in a red light district or grabbing her rifle and scaring up some supper. Myrtle and Bianca chatter about going to Erica's "bride room" and how Jackson is in the dining room "surrounded by well-wishers," and Kendall carries a teetering stack of boxes and a bouquet, and there's a ton of bustle and activity when Somber!Greens arrives in the lobby. She eavesdrops, unnoticed in the tizzy. Commercials.

Still more lobby wedding tizzy. Opal takes photos of Myrt, Erica, and Binks. Then there are pictures with Kendall, Erica, and Binks. Greenlee steps out again from behind a plant and stares blankly after them as they rush off. Smia rush in and drag her to the bar with them.

Erica's Chamber of Frippery. Opal slams down a can of hairspray and declares her work done. But . . . Erica's hair is the same as it was two minutes ago . . .? Anyway, Myrtle coos, and she and Opal leave. Bianca and Kendall coo, too, but Erica is starting to wig. She's making up thing to find wrong with her bouquet. Kendall reassures her. Kendall is so generous sometimes. "I know what you're doing, and you don't have to," she says. "Because the one man who can give you all the love and happiness you can handle is waiting for you." Aww. I hope Kendall finds that someday. But Erica, looking a little ill, says she can't do it. Lucci delivered that line as if Erica was both resigned to failure and nauseated—totally perfect. Commercials.

Erica's not having second thoughts, she says, but she wonders if she really deserves "such happiness." I wish I had been watching this soap long enough to know how Erica has behaved at all her past weddings. Does she always seem this in love, for maximum soapy effect, or are things really different with Jack? I mean, not that the last line wasn't dumb, but I wish I knew. Bianca asks if Erica remembers the last time the three of them were all dressed up together like this. Erica does: it was her wedding to Dimitri. Bianca reminds her that she told them that "no matter how much men loved you, they still got terrified of weddings." And Kendall remembers that Erica wasn't scared at all. Pernt being? Erica says it's because she had Bianca and Kendall . . . and Mona. She wishes Mona were here. Bianca says that she is. She finds the picture of Mona and brings it to Erica. "Do you remember what she said to us that day?" Bianca steers Erica toward the mirror. They all stare into it, looking like McCall's pattern drawings or something. Bianca continues: "She called us a legacy. A family of strong women. And that's what we are. And we can overcome anything." "Even wedding butterflies," chimes Kendall. Erica smiles and says that Mona was right. This truly is a Very Special All My Chirrens. "We are incredibly strong," Erica soaps. "And we are so incredibly lucky to have each other." She gives them each a kiss on the cheek. She's ready. "It's time to get your mother married!" Awesome!

Dining room. The Wedding March is playing. The doors open, and everybody turns. Commercials.

Everybody's looking and waiting. Kendall steps into the open doors, pauses—Jack and Reggie knock fists; Boyd gives her a wink (eeee!)—and begins the walk. When she makes it to the front, Jack grins and gives her a kiss. Bianca appears in the doors and scans the crowd to find Maggie. David watches pensively as she walks down the aisle. Jack gives Bianca a kiss. Now we hear strains of "Here Comes the Bride," and everybody stands. Erica arrives, and, naturally, she's wearing a white sleeveless halter gown. This one has a giant ruff on it, though. Eh? It's, like, a big cascade of Pirate Shirt ruffles. Plus, her hair? It's suddenly up. No more Annie Oakley for her. The crowd murmurs over her radiance. Erica pauses in the doors. Jack grins. Erica beams. "I love you," Jack mouths. Myrtle schooches up behind Erica and beams, too. They inch their way down the aisle and finally make it to the front. Reverend Ritter starts his "dearly beloved . . ." spiel. As he talks about the husband-and-wife union, we see the happy Martins and the not-so-happy Devane-Haywards. Stuart presents a reading; he tells Erica she looks beautiful. He gives Erica and Jack kisses on the cheek. His reading is "Hope is the Thing with Feathers," an Emily Dickinson poem. Erica seems tickled by the title. It's a very pretty poem. Reverend Ritter asks who gives Erica, and Myrtle rises and waits an eternity before saying, "her mother and I do."

Reverend Ritter asks the "speak now or forever hold your peace" bit, and we're treated to Erica squirming, tense music playing, Opal looking around surreptitiously, and Kendall steeling herself for disaster. Reverend Ritter stars to proceed again, but somebody yells, "Hold on!" It's Greenlee, natch. "I've got something to say." She and Erica lock eyes. Commercials.

Like the recap? Discuss it on our message board.

Screen grabs courtesy of Olga Online.© 2000-2003 (texts) are with the author. If not otherwise stated, the author is Ivanova. All rights reserved.